we wish you a merry Christmas... we WISH you a....

hola blogger readers. FINALLY pulled myself together and purchased a Christmas tree! Last year we had like a 1 footer that graced our counter top. This year I felt the need to really go all out with the puniest 6 footer from good ol' Walmart. The store that causes me mucho pain. I'm not sure where these random spanish words are coming from, but I'm just gonna go with it.

So we get home yesterday evening and I lug all my Christmas decor upstairs from my car... prepare the children for a beautiful evening of decorating our first tree.. in like a long time... and bust out the 100 pieces of greenery with a stand from the ever so deceiving box.
Don't worry... Levi has the directions. For whatever reason, unbeknown to me, I do not realize as I am unboxing this little beast, that it is not pre-lit, as I was led to believe. I blame it on my entitlement to insanity on account of I have 2 small children. So I'm half way done putting the tree together before I realize that I have no lights. CRAP. Meanwhile Levi is assuring me that I'm doing a great job at the assembly of the tree. "Good job mom. Mom.. it looks like you're doing it right. Mom, that piece goes right there where you put it.. Mom". Thanks.. but here's the thing kid.. totally forgot to purchase lights for this tree.. so we're gonna have to wait until tomorrow to decorate it. Of course Levi is chill with this minor dilemma, but drama overhears and puts her pouty face on followed up with some whining and a mini-guilt trip. I made a pretty quick recovery after the plea bargain of a delicious bedtime snack and fabulous bedtime story.
Attempt 2 at tree decorating: Success! After the massive amounts of decorations I piled on this frail little tree.. It actually looks like something festive. ¡Feliz Navidad!

dear blog.

So I feel like its been too long since I've written anything. So I'm making my come-back tonight.
I would first like to talk about Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite of the holidays on account of I love the food. The mashed potatoes, the green bean casserole, the stuffing, and my very favorite.. the pumpkin pie (which I am of course eating right now). Plus thanksgiving doesn't require that whole buying everybody a present thing. I mean.... sure it's a nice thought. Giving is nice, but let's be real... the majority of the people I know don't have the kind of money to actually thoroughly enjoy spending it on buying someone else something. We've got bills to worry about. Hello.. recession.
I'm starting a new job in 2 weeks. Pretty crazy right. My goal is to pretty much change everything I can about my life.. and like.. start over. Don't worry, I'm keeping my kids still ;).  I have also thought of getting a cat. A cat or a fish. Me and Shaylin can't decide. Shaylin is leaning towards fish because she said they won't run around and they don't smell bad. We'll have to see what the final verdict is in a couple days. I've always hated cats.. but what with me being open to change now and all... I figure why not.

maybe.. maybe not.. hard to say 

Levi has his Christmas program at school tomorrow night. I'll be sure to record it and take some pictures. At last years he literally just stood there the whole time with this real serious look on his face.. and mouthed a few of the lyrics to the songs. We'll see if he can let loose a little now that he's in Kindergarten!


oh bedtime... I love you.

goodnight

behold.. its November.

I would like to first start off by saying that I had this horrible flashback as I was folding my 3rd load of laundry. My mind went back to the days of potty training. I cannot express in words how happy I am that that part of my life is over with. You always think looking back on things that they won't be as bad as they seemed at the time, but in all seriousness... if its any worse than I remember it being... I re-feel sorry for myself. (and any other parent who has endured the experience).

The holidays are just around the corner. Well first of course there's my birthday, which until I turn 30 I plan to celebrate to the utmost. That's the weekend we'll be moving into our new apartment though, so I feel like I'm getting slightly cheated. I'm sure I'll figure out a way to compensate. Anyhoo, I really just realized how close Christmas is today when we received the fabulous Target toy catalog in the mail. Normally toy catalogs don't interest me much... I toss it to one of the kids and they're entertained for a good hour. However, we were running short on our time for reading (we have to read 10 minutes every night says Levi's homework folder) and I felt like the toy catalog could qualify as reading.. I mean... there are words inside.. kind of. Then something amazing was brought to my attention.... secretly hidden inside the middle of this catalog... is the most awesome coupon booklet ever. I'm talking 50% off... this isn't your typical "really they consider 10% off a discount.. that barely covers sales tax" kind of deal. This is like.... mom gold. I was so stoked I immediately ripped that sucker out and began my Christmas shopping LIST. That's right.. I made a list. Well technically the list is still in my head but I have every intention of putting it into a more tangible form.

Shaylin's school picture order form thing came back today. Not to be biased, but my kid should be a freakin' baby gap model. Her hair is even done, and if you know my child you know that's a rare occurrence. I'll be sure to post the glamor shots when we get the real ones that are big enough to see without super magnifying mom eyes and word "proof" written across it, because you know how people like to steal teeny tiny little photos.

Two may actually in fact be better than one.

Today was "dress up as a hero" day at Shaylin's school. Guess which mom forgot? Yea, that's right.. this one did. My mom picked up Shaylin from school who was evidently pretty devastated about her mommy forgetting to dress her up. Supposedly she was the only one in her class who didn't have a costume on.. and since this is a private school, where all the parents are over-achievers.... I wouldn't be surprised if she was the only one in the whole little school. Bad Mommy. I felt HORRIBLE!

Then after I pick up the kids and am halfway home, the PTC calls to remind me today is the pick up day for the fundraiser cookie dough. I somehow managed to miss this on the calendar as well. It becomes apparent to me at this point.... that I either need a personal assistant or a man in my life. I'm leaning toward the personal assistant... better yet: a manny

On a bright note, Levi was one of the best sellers for the fundraiser. This almost makes up for my lack of ability to dress up my child on "hero day". I said almost okay.... I'm sure I'll dwell on it at least for the remainder of the week.

cooties dot com

First off, I would like to state the fact that this is the first time since I've gotten home that I have sat on my butt for longer than 3 minutes. That detail paired with my freshly poured glass of pinot grigio... makes me all sorts of content.

Levi got in trouble at school today. Today AND yesterday! Which is nuts because yesterday was the first time all year his teacher sent a note home about him misbehaving. I gave him a long lecture last night when I found the note and reminded him this morning when I dropped him off to NOT get in trouble again or there would be hell to pay (yes I did actually slip and use the word hell.. which he corrected me on, but I ensured him it was ok to use it in this context and that the rules of not saying "hell" didn't apply to me). So of course today he would have to get in trouble again only this time he even got "written up"! This is the first time we've had that happen. I felt the need to get creative with punishment. Of course I started with a lecture... this time I took the guilt route since evidently yesterday's "mean mommy" lecture held no long term effect. Success.. I made a breakthrough when the eyes began to water.. then I followed up with lots of love. When he got over his 5 minute emotional moment he was told "no toys, no tv, nothing fun! you're going to do your homework and when you finish... you're going to write lines!" 25 lines of "I will obey" (its a short line.. I'm not that mean). It was great because after each line he wrote he counted how many he had left.. punishment with a learning twist. I like it. We'll see how well that worked.. if he comes home with red pen notes tomorrow I might have a breakdown.

Shaylin only had 1 meltdown today, which is a huge improvement. Its always something unpredictable with her. You never know when that cute little girl is going to bust out her psychotic monster personality. The magic is in the "later". I read somewhere that parents use the word "no" more than any other word but for me I think its "later". Its a much safer word. "can I get a new toy?"... "later".. "can you read this 35 page long dora book?"... "later"... "can I have a cookie"... you get the drill. Even now when I say no this is how the conversation goes:
"mommy, can I have some candy"
"no"
"later?"
"no"
"after later?"
"no"
"monday?"
"no!"
then the meltdown. I should have ended it with the first later.

Happy Birthday, Girl

So today is Shaylin's 4th birthday. 4 years of raising a girl.... 14 more to go. Well, I guess really it will be longer than that but putting it that way makes me feel like the chances of going completely nuts seem a little less likely.
Who am I kidding... I'm obviously already half way to the nut house.
Lately Shaylin has been completely obsessed with all the ridiculously girly stuff. I used to think that she wouldn't ever be a girly girl because she was always so dirty. I mean, any little girl who enjoys getting food in their hair, spitting, and biting their toe nails just doesn't strike me as the princess kind. However, she has managed to somehow pull it all off. She loves getting her nails painted even though shortly after she begins the process of biting all the nail polish off.... then begging me to re-paint them the next day. She's a mess... perhaps the acorn doesn't fall far from the tree after all.
I was going through some of her baby pictures to reminisce..... so here's some to share:

I love them :)

Happy 4th Birthday Ms. Shaylin 

"you're the best mommy ever"

My favorite sentence. Anytime Shaylin gets new clothes or shoes, or in this case a Halloween costume, she goes on for a good hour about how I'm the "best mommy ever". Its great that she's learning these skills at such a young age. I got her a fairy princess costume. This is because she couldn't decide whether she wanted to be a fairy.. or a princess. Thank you Old Navy for solving my crisis situation. It even said so on the tag.

Here's the lesson I learned this week. Always open the back-pack on Friday. I am absolutely disgusted by the smell of old pop-corn. Do you know what I'm talking about? When you throw it out but then forget to take the trash out and the next day it smells like burnt butt hole meets butter. Well I made the mistake of opening Levi's back-pack tonight and getting that awful wiff. Why is there a bag of pop-corn in there? I didn't send him to school with it. I don't understand. Nor do I appreciate it.

I decided to take some pics of Levi's artwork while I was cleaning out the bag. This way I can cherish them forever but not have to keep all of them, because let's face it, I'm like the extreme opposite of a hoarder... (I googled a term for anti-hoarder and came back with only one result: an  "over-exuberant sparseness nut". I can handle that.)

baby levi (kind of creepy.. but cute)

(his house..)

we love sugar.

cooking with Shaylin.

we're messy. obviously.

at least I didn't lick my arm.

prince charming is coming on tuesday.

And so it is another rainy weekend. Normally I get slightly bluesy with extended amounts of gloominess, however, I have not reached that point quite yet. It is a perfect Saturday evening with my grande pumpkin spice latte in hand. I'm a happy mom. A happy mom who has put one too many Barbie outfits on. Those little suckers are a pain in the booty.  
Levi has successfully finished his first school fundraiser. We sold 20 containers of cookie dough. Woot. So for those of you who were kind enough to purchase over-priced dough in a tub, you will be happy to know that Levi scored a "space sparkle light" some "rocket balloons" and all sorts of other "out of this world" prizes. I wonder what we're selling next...
Today we ran some errands and ended up at the mall. I'm browsing the the sale rack of Shaylin's size clothes and I'm hearing "I want this mommy, it's perfect!" which I hear about 500 times in any store on account of my child already has a shopping problem. So, I don't pay much attention to what it is she's showing me and just respond with "uh-huh, later honey" like I always do, because I've learned that the word "no" ends with a very dramatic scene. After her repeating it something like 10 times and the lady standing near us giving a slight chuckle, I look down to see my 3 year old holding a training bra and matching panties. I couldn't help but laugh hysterically. She did not think it was funny. "Shaylin, honey, that's not your size. When you're bigger, ok?" This is where the drama comes into play. Luckily, it was only a brief meltdown and then she got distracted by the head bands and hello kitty purses.
Levi is spending the night at my parent's house tonight so we can have a night for the girls. So its off to watch Sleeping Beauty until our friends (by our I mean mine) get here and maybe Shaylin can convince them to paint her toenails.

WHAT.... a whirlwind

Oh my gosh. I am tired. I am so tired that I haven't even found it within me to write in this here blog. What a crazy past 2 weeks.. or 3.. however long its been. First of all, I wrecked my car. That was a disaster. So the car accident slash trying to get used to my life with everyone back in school and working later to make up for being at school thing made me have a slight mental breakdown.
The rental car does not have a clicker. I never appreciated my clicker so much. For it to be raining at 6:30 in the morning, having 2 small children, 2 backpacks, 2 lunches, an asthma machine, and a bag of trash walking from our apartment to the car and then trying to unlock the doors... is just.... way too stressful. Which by the way what is up with this weather?! I'm so tired of hurricane season. I am ready for nice cold winter.
Meanwhile, Levi has been assigned a "homework folder". This is the delightful thing his teacher sends home every Monday with daily assignments. PLUS a reading log to log in the MINUTES we read each day and a space to put in every book we read. Seriously? By the time we get home and I get them fed, bathed, throw in laundry, clean up the kitchen, and do Levi's "daily assignment", you'll be lucky if I can keep my eye balls open long enough to read one book. But no... one is not enough. Apparently my child will not grow up to be all the man he can be on one book a night.
Shaylin told me today that she wanted to marry me. This was slightly concerning seeing as most little girls want to marry their dad. It was even more concerning when I told her that she couldn't marry me because 1. I'm her mother so that's awkward, and 2. she should probably marry a boy because boys and girls get married.. that's how it works. She responded with "I never want to marry a boy. Boys are NO fun." After much convincing She decided maybe a boy was a better idea. "But you have to go to school and get real smart though, so you'll always be smarter than him" was my last piece of advice. "Why?" of course there's a why. "Because then you will always have the last word and be able to tell him what to do."
I feel like it was super good advice

ps I need a vacation. I feel like California makes for excellent prospects

meet me halfway

So mid-week disaster: kid 2 is sick. Shaylin was crying all night... turns out she has ear infections in both ears. Poor thing woke up all delusional crying to me about Levi yelling at her too loud.. and a lot of other words I couldn't understand. I was like um... Shaylin, Levi is passed out... there's no way he's yelling at you. She didn't believe me.
On the way to my parent's house this morning I pointed out my school to Levi. This is the conversation that followed:

"Mom, are there boys at your school?"
"yeah, there's boys, but they are older. There aren't any kids there."
"Maybe you could marry one"
"What? Why do you think I need to marry someone at my school?"
"Because you need someone to help you do all kinds of stuff"
"Don't worry Levi, in a couple of years I'll put you to work"

He totally cracks me up sometimes with his random advice. I think its cute though how he worries about me. NOT cute how he argues with me sometimes like he's a 35 year old man or something. What's even worse is when it turns out he's right. We had a very long debate over getting his new toy cars out of the box. He was going on about needing a screw driver. "What?! you don't need a screwdriver to get a toy out of the box Levi... seriously.. its a $10 toy!". After 10 minutes of him going on about the screw driver I finish what I'm doing and go to get his toy out. Crap... this sucker is not coming out. I realize at this point that you do in fact need a screwdriver but I can't let my 5 year old know I was wrong so I'm trying to get it out without one. Not gonna happen. "Okay Levi, you were right. We need a screw driver". This is the first time I think I have ever had to admit being wrong to my own kid. "See mom, I'm really smart right?"

School is going good so far, for me and Mr. Levi. Shaylin doesn't start until after Labor Day.. hopefully by then she'll be over the whole sick-ness situation. Levi is in the "Clifford" class so every day he comes home with a new book about Clifford. I was never a fan of Clifford... I mean.... that dog is like out of control huge. I just don't even understand how having a pet that big can bring anything good to life. Imagine the pooper scooper necessary.

day 1

Alarm goes off at 5 am. I immediately hit the snooze, at this point I can't remember what possessed me to wake up so early or who I am for that matter. 10 minutes later I begin my day.

I bought one of these super cool mom crust cutter-offers from H-E-B last weekend. It cuts the sandwiches in an awesome heart shape (yes I realize at some point Levi will not be thrilled about heart shaped sandwiches, but the dinosaur cutter shape looked too complicated) packed Levi's lunch, got the kids up (for the first time ever I woke up before them), and made a semi-nutritious breakfast. I'm feeling good about myself at this point because we are actually running ahead of schedule. 

Approximately 45 minutes later we arrive at my parents house. Thank GOD my parents are awesome and help me out as much as they do. Mondays and Wednesdays they will be dropping Levi off at school so that I can get to my school on time. This is the first year as a single mom that I will attempt to juggle school, work, and kids. Yes, just as soon as I finally get a grasp on my new reality I decide to challenge myself by actually making my life harder. I feel like in the long run It will totally pay off!

I get to school... accounting class first. My professor looks like she's hungover, and for whatever reason, I admire this about her. That and she's super sarcastic and is totally against the parking lot police. Apparently at some point she got a ticket for having one of her wheels on the white line. She's not over it. I feel kind of old until a gray haired old dude in a muscle tank and some serious body hair issues shows up. I am officially not the oldest person in the class, yay. 

Second class is Business Computer Applications. This will be great because I have totally forgotten anything I ever learned about Microsoft Office in high school. Probably because high school was 7 years ago, which I try not to remind myself of. My professor starts the class with some ridiculous word puzzles to "break the ice". Are you serious? 

Then its off to work I go......

3:30 yes my job is awesome because I can pretty much leave whenever I need to. Today the need to was 3:30. I have totally lost any tiny smidgen left of my caffeine buzz and since I'm still getting over being sick, part of me feels like someone shot me in the face. I will adjust I'm sure. Head to pick up the kids. 

I get to my parents where my mom has already dissected Levi's back pack and took it upon herself to read everything and then give me some ridiculous long version of all the information she gathered. 

Tonights homework: Levi brought home 3 homework assignments. Seriously? His first day of kindergarten and already they're on homework. Not just that but its not even HIS homework, its MINE. "Please write your child's name on every crayon in the box". Really? I mean is that necessary.. apparently so, Levi says its due tomorrow. Then we have to figure out something tiny enough to fit in the little bag they sent home for show and tell. Levi wants to take a hot wheels. I'm not sure if that qualifies, but I'll go with it. Then we study up on how and why Clifford is such a big red dog.

My pretty sandwich came back with one bite out of it. That made me slightly bitter. 

Its off to homework, baths, laundry, dishes, grown up homework, and then.. bed :)